Whole Living Today

“We have stopped for a moment to encounter each other, to meet, to love, to share. This is a precious moment, but it is transient. It is a little parenthesis in eternity. If we share with caring, lightheartedness, and love, we will create abundance and joy for each other. And then this moment will have been worthwhile.” ~Deepak Chopra

I finished reading a wonderful novel a few weeks ago that contained a beautiful story in it which I wanted to post on my blog. But, I figured it might be a little too long and that I might be infringing on the copyright notice of “except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical articles and reviews.”

As I’ve mentioned in a previous post, Paulo Coelho is one of my favorite authors. His book “The Alchemist” is the best read for those seeking. There is a great interview in Newsweek Magazine where bestselling author Paulo Coelho reveals how he supports piracy of his own work. I do agree with his philosophy on internet books. If people like what they read on the internet; reviews, scanning a chapter of a book, quotes, they will purchase the book. Who is really going to sit in front of the computer and read a whole novel? Libraries are still growing, books are not going out of style because of the internet. Books are like friends, they provide entertainment, company, and insight. A book is something tangible, something to hold on to and enjoy. To be reread at a later date. As we grow, we are able to see different concepts, ideas and symbolism because our perceptions have changed.

So, I’m going to take a little liberty and post this wonderful story from Paulo Coelho’s book “Eleven Minutes: A Novel“, a story of passion, desire, love, disappointment, freedom, and dreams.

“Once upon a time, there was a bird. He was adorned with two perfect wings and with glossy, colorful, marvelous feathers. In short, he was a creature made to fly about freely in the sky, bringing joy to everyone who saw him.

One day, a woman saw this bird and fell in love with him. She watched his flight, her mouth wide in amazement, her heart pounding, her eyes shining with excitement. She invited the bird to fly with her, and the two travelled across the sky in perfect harmony. She admired and venerated and celebrated that bird.

But then she thought: He might want to visit far-off mountains! And she was afraid, afraid that she would never feel the same way about any other bird. And she felt envy, envy for the bird’s ability to fly.

And she felt alone.

And she thought: “I’m going to set a trap. The next time the bird appears, he will never leave again.”

The bird, who was also in love, returned the following day, fell into the trap and was put in a cage.

She looked at the bird every day. There he was, the object of her passion, and she showed him to her friends, who said: “Now you have everything you could possibly want.” However, a strange transformation began to take place: now that she had the bird and no longer needed to woo him, she began to lose interest. The bird, unable to fly and express the true meaning of his life, began to waste away and his feathers to lose their gloss; he grew ugly; and the woman no longer paid him any attention, except for feeding him and cleaning out his cage.

One day, the bird died. The woman felt terribly sad and spent all her time thinking about him. But she did not remember the cage, she thought only of the day when she had seen him for the first time, flying contentedly amongst the clouds.

If she had looked more deeply into herself, she would have realized that what had thrilled her about the bird was his freedom, the energy of his wings in motion, not his physical body.

Without the bird, her life too lost all meaning, and Death came knocking at her door. “Why have you come?” she asked Death. “So that you can fly once more with him across the sky,” Death replied. “If you had allowed him to come and go, you would have loved and admired him even more; alas, you now need me in order to find him again.”

Visit Paulo’s blog for quotes, stories, interviews and more: Paulo Coelho

I’m the one that friends call. Anytime. For anything. I’m the one that’s always there. Without judgement. One night a few years ago a close friend called. Needed someone to “hang out with.” For the first time, I said I couldn’t, too tired. He died that night. He fell asleep with a cigarette. There’s an empty spot here now. Not just from the torn down building but in our hearts. I’ve been told by others that I wasn’t the only one he called asking for help that night. Does that make me feel better?

How much do we give of our Self? At what point do we draw our boundaries?

His funeral was on a Monday. I asked and the band in the park that evening played….

Stormy Monday 

Balance and being whole. Balance is more than just balancing events and emotions within our lives. Balance is about finding the balance of our feminine and masculine. The balance of energies. Until we reach that point we search for that balance outside of our Self. Although we are complete as we are, we may be suppressing aspects of our Self.

I’m not talking males and females but those aspects of the masculine and feminine within.

Let’s use an example. If we are denying our Self of our masculine aspects, we will seek that in another. Is that why some women (or men) wind up drawing controlling, dominating relationships into their lives? To balance out their nurturing, gentle side? And in doing so, fulfilling the suppressed feminine side of the other as well? This isn’t balance, or love, this is co-dependency.

Love will be found within the balance of Self.

 Related Post

• Finding Balance

“Soul mate love is a mystical partnership that exposes us to the most universal life lessons. With soul mate love we learn to recognize the divine spirit in each of our hearts and go beyond the self so that two in a relationship truly can become One.”

Last year my mom very excitedly gave me two books, on no particular day. ”The One: Discovering the Secrets of Soul Mate Love” and “Expect a Miracle: 7 Spiritual Steps to Finding the Right Relationship“, both by Kathy Freston. My mom can be kind of tactful, guess she wasn’t real happy with the relationship I was in or my previous choices either. But I also know that I wasn’t ready. I’m thinking, “Great… more how-to-get-the-right-man.” At least it was books and not an introduction to someone. I recommend both of these books to anyone, male or female, looking for, or currently in a relationship. Both the books place the emphasis on the individual first; even being aware of this, these books enforce the message.

In order to be in a loving, healthy relationship, we have to first focus on our own transformation. We need to be whole as individuals before we can come together in partnership with someone else. Kathy’s books offer insightful messages, mantras, meditations, and questions guiding us to grow to wholeness.

“Our lives are like a vessel through which divine energy flows; if we don’t clear the stumbling blocks that we encounter, we keep the energy of a spiritual relationship from entering.”

The blockages that we encounter within our lives are fear based. Fear occurs when we are not empowered and whole. Many individuals rely on external sources for love and acceptance. This creates fear. Feelings of anger, control, abandonment, lack of self-esteem, jealousy, insecurity, loneliness, disappointment, resentment, etc. develop when the hold upon the external source or individual begins to slip away or is no longer present. All feelings are based either on love or fear. By loving and accepting who we are as individuals, fear will not exist. Until we can love our Self fully, any relationship is co-dependency, relying on something else to provide for the love and acceptance that is lacking within oneself.

“A soulmate is someone who has locks that fit our keys, and keys to fit our locks. When we feel safe enough to open the locks, our truest selves step out and we can be completely and honestly who we are; we can be loved for who we are and not for who we’re pretending to be. Each unveils the best part of the other. No matter what else goes wrong around us, with that one person we’re safe in our own paradise. Our soulmate is someone who shares our deepest longings, our sense of direction. When we’re two balloons, and together our direction is up, chances are we’ve found the right person. Our soulmate is the one who makes life come to life.”  The Bridge Across Forever: A True Love Story by Richard Bach

Related Post:   New Beginnings 2008

Leave a comment and share your experiences or thoughts on soul mates.